Roller Coaster Ride

I've recently learned something the hard way. Children break your heart. It's not their fault mind you that you love them so much. But from the moment you give birth to them, it's like your own heart beating and walking around in their body. This is inconvenient to say the least. Every, and I mean every experience that happens to them, happens to you, only more intensely. I was unprepared for this exhilarating, terrifying, nausea producing roller coaster ride of parenthood. But, apparently, I like roller coasters because I came back for more!

I experienced the euphoria of every successful horse jump my daughter ever took and also watched helplessly when she was thrown off.  I agonized with her over every boyfriend breakup, the bad ones and the really terrible ones. Then one day I watched her transform into an amazing young woman with a huge heart who would love and help me transition her three new younger siblings into our family.

Children are oblivious to the effect they have on their parents as they should be, until they have kids of their own and experience it themselves. I know this was the case when we moved to the west coast away from my family. Oh I was homesick alright, but I had no idea I was taking my mother's heart with me to Seattle! I was too busy starting my new adventure. Yet, when I asked my mom how she handled our moving away, she answered, " I knew it was the best decision for your family." She was right. It was. But I didn't know until just now that it's easier to be the one leaving than the one left. It's easier to be the child. Now that my baby girl is moving across the country, it's my turn to be gracious and understanding. I shouldn't be surprised she is leaving, I set the example!

Still, I'm happy and excited for my girl. She is brave and wants to support her husband. How could I not be proud? I know that God has a wonderful plan for her in California and I'm excited to hear all about it. There have been tears and I know there will be more, and I'm not a crier! I love that this is so hard.

Inspired

Love, Love, Loved the MOVE conference this year. It is always inspiring to hear from missionaries from around the world who don't consider themselves special and do not want a pat on the back. They are merely answering the call that God has on their life. The missionary from Africa we heard from last night at our dessert social told us that they have struggles just like we all have struggles, that they just look different. He then proceeded to tell us that they have electricity most of the time, enough to keep a refrigerator running and they are four hours from their p.o. box where they can receive mail. They have found themselves discouraged at times, sometimes very discouraged in their work to share the gospel. They will only get to know their grandchild through Skype if the one flaky Internet connection in town happens to be working. I'm sorry, but my struggles are not worthy to be compared with their struggles.

As he was talking and showing his slide show of his truck stuck in the mud on the road and the grass huts, I'm trying to picture myself there and honestly could not. They are there, a church of two, no Bible studies, no worship services. They are church planters and go where there are no churches. I don't have the best imagination but just the homeschooling part would be enough to do me in. Not to mention, there was no Target in sight! I realized again how ridiculously comfortable I am here in East Cobb. I also realized how blessed I am to have a church where I can freely worship with fellow believers and to remember to pray for those who do not.

Our special guest thanked us for our support and for bringing them to the conference, but he blessed us with his testimony of obedience like I have never seen. He closed with the most amazing statement that he couldn't wait to get back!

Do you not know that those who run in a race all run, but only one receives the prize? Run in such a way that you may win. 1 Cor. 9:24